


All Roads Alledgedly Lead to Samantha

by foxtales



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Crack, Gen, complete and utter crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-01
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:15:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21633508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foxtales/pseuds/foxtales
Summary: “Don’t touch that, Mulder!”
Relationships: Gen - Relationship
Kudos: 6





	All Roads Alledgedly Lead to Samantha

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for tigg71 way back in 2006. It's a total send up of the show and I had a lot of fun writing it.

“Don’t touch that, Mulder!”

“Why not, Scully? It could be alien technology. This could lead to Samantha.”

“True, an unknown pile of goop could lead the way to your sister. It could also devour you.”

“I saw the blob, okay? Besides, this isn’t pink.”

“Yes, because apparently all aliens are colour coordinated,” Scully said, rolling her eyes.

“Are you dismissing my theory?”

“You’re being ridiculous, Mulder. We have no idea what it is and, without even taking it to the lab and testing it, you want to believe it’s some form of alien technology?”

Mulder looked at her for several moments but saw his hangdog expression was not working in the least. His hand shot out as he said, “I just want to…”

“No,” Scully said, slapping his hand away from the viscous substance.

“Aw, come on, Scully. Give into the thirst for knowledge and the need for adventure just this once.”

“Working with you on a daily basis is all the adventure I need, Mulder.” She sighed as he snorted. “At least put on some gloves if you insist on putting your hands where they don’t belong.”

Mulder quickly pulled on some gloves and collected a sample. He carefully catalogued it and carried it back to the lab, then badgered Scully into testing it right away. She dressed in full biohazard gear, and made him promise to stay on the other side of the glass. He reluctantly agreed and watched her perform her tests.

She came out ten minutes later, a smile on her face. She walked to the rest of the sample and dipped her finger in it before crossing the room to her partner.

Mulder’s eyebrow rose as he watched her hand slowly rise to rub the substance into his hair.

“Now style.”

“What?”

“A little dab’ll do ya, Mulder.”

He looked at her for several seconds and Scully wondered what he was thinking. Finally, he burst out laughing. “The secrets of the universe contained in hair gel. Who knew?”


End file.
